Sunday, April 30, 2006

The Rest of the NFL, Part II

In the previous post I tackled my feelings on the AFC East. Now I'm going to move over to the NFC East.

NFC East
Dallas Cowboys
They're the Yankees of the NFL. If you're not a Cowboys fan you have to hate them. I do. I didn't get to see the Cowboys when they had seemingly stand-up guys like Roger Staubach. It probably would have been harder to hate them then. Fortunately, I knew the Cowboys at the end of the Landry era when they were terrible and into the Jimmy Johnson/Barry Switzer years. They were winning everything except for their court battles. Michael Irvin, Leon Lett were constantly getting busted for drugs and for being general assholes. Now they have Terrell Owens. This team is easy to hate.

New York Giants
Here's a team that I probably should hate but don't. I don't root for them, but I don't root against them. They're just another team in the league that rises to the top every now and then. They had some despicable characters in the '90s - Lawrence Taylor comes to mind - but were not necessarily hateable for a Colts fan. I'll hate them more if they pick off the Colts in the season opener this year.

Philadelphia Eagles
My college roommate was an Eagles fan (still is) so I have a certain affection for this team. I've seen the suffering of the Eagles fans up close. Because of my roommate, this team became my "NFC team" for a while. The Eagles fans have a reputation for being tough, but also smart. They will boo the hell out of you, but only if you half ass or consistently suck. Rarely does a player get booed for one mistake. As it stands, I root for the Eagles to make their way to the Super Bowl to get whipped against the Colts so that I can rub it in to my old roommate.

Washington Redskins
Let's see. Fat guys in dresses and pig noses. An overpaid and aging Deion Sanders. Steve Spurrier recently coached them. Some of the most mediocre championship teams of all time. Ugh. This is a team that sneaks up and wins Super Bowls in years that no one else seems to want them. They won the Super Bowl with Mark Rypien at the helm. Are you kidding me? How did this happen? I'll tell you. The rest of the NFC rolled over and the Buffalo Bills showed up in the Super Bowl, that's how. Christ. I'm going to go punch a tree until it dies.

Stay tuned for the next installment coming up after my thoughts on the Colts' draft.

Tuesday, April 11, 2006

The Rest of the NFL

As NFL fans we don't live in a fan vacuum. We have our team and we're loyal to our team. Ideally, we'd root for our team every week and against whoever they play. Unfortunately, it's not that simple. You see, we humans have something called "memory" and this "memory" allows us to recall things that have happened in the past. These "memories" stick with us and we then attach them to other teams in the NFL. Because of this, you'd be hard pressed to find an NFL fan that doesn't have feelings about every other team in the NFL. Including me.

This is the first in an eight part series on my feelings on the rest of the teams in the NFL. I'll start with the AFC East.

AFC East
Buffalo Bills
The AFC East is the Colts old division. Lots of bad blood with these teams. It's hard to forget the early 90's when the Bills consistently put the smack down on the Colts in a big way. Sure, I'm still bitter. Still, it's hard to hate this team too much. They're bad and they'll be bad for a while. Plus, they have some of the ugliest uniforms in the league.

Miami Dolphins
This team doesn't actually have fans. Just people who live near the stadium. You'll never meet a Dolphins fan who will get in fight for his team. Hell, Hootie is their most well-known fan. I don't even think Dan Marino roots for the Dolphins. People only wear this team's gear because they like the color aqua. This is a non-team. They're not even worth my hate.

New England Patriots
This seems like a no-brainer. I should hate these guys, right? Yeah, I should. I don't. They've owned the Colts up until last season. That's enough to make most Colts fans hate them. However, this is a team that just plays great football. They also play with class. Hard to hate that. I respect these guys, but I still love beating the hell out of them. Of course, I didn't admit it to any of the Pats fans I know. Just another win, I said.

New York Jets
You almost have to fell sorry for this team. They've been hovering around mediocrity for as long as I can remember. This is a franchise that should be at the top of the conference every year. I mean, they're a New York team for Christ's sake. Yet, every year they come up short. They either miss the playoffs altogether or blow it in the first game. You know, I think I do feel sorry for them. That's probably the most insulting thing you can say to another team's fans.

Not a lot of love for the AFC East. Stay tuned for the next installment.